entertainment Joke/picture of the day - Whatever make people laugh

johnn · Dec 31, 2021

Post your joke here to make other people laugh and happy.

Since it started raining, all my wife has done is look sadly through the stupid window…

If it gets any worse, I’ll have to let her in.
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Two men were talking about their wives

The first man says “My wife is an angel.” The second man says “You’re lucky, mine’s still alive.”

johnn · Jan 17, 2022

Musings for the times

1. The dumbest thing I ever bought was a 2020 planner.

2. I was so bored I called Jake from State Farm just to talk to someone. He asked me what I was wearing.

3. 2019: Stay away from negative people. 2020: Stay away from positive people.

4. The world has turned upside down. Old folks are sneaking out of the house & their kids are yelling at them to stay indoors!

5. This morning I saw a neighbor talking to her dog. It was obvious she thought her dog understood her. I came into my house & told my cat. We laughed a lot.

6. Every few days try your jeans on just to make sure they fit. Pajamas will have you believe all is well in the kingdom.

7. Does anyone know if we can take showers yet or should we just keep washing our hands?

8. This virus has done what no woman has been able to do. Cancel sports, shut down all bars & keep men at home!

9. I never thought the comment, "I wouldn't touch him/her with a 6-foot pole" would become a national policy, but here we are!

10. I need to practice social-distancing from the refrigerator.

11. I hope the weather is good tomorrow for my trip to the Backyard. I'm getting tired of the Living Room.

12. Appropriate analogy. "The curve is flattening so we can start lifting restrictions now" is like saying "The parachute has slowed our rate of descent, so we can take it off now."

13. Never in a million years could I have imagined I would go up to a bank teller wearing a mask & asking for money.

Alop · Jan 3, 2022

johnn · Jan 25, 2022

Go away and take your spam top somewhere else.
Not in my thread.
Do you have a mental problem?

mr-x · Apr 1, 2022

johnn · Jan 4, 2022

Remote Control For Husband.
Available on Amazon

RobM · Jan 25, 2022

What's got two legs and bleeds a lot?

Half a dog.

redemo · Jan 1, 2022

My wife's credit card was stolen but i didn't bother to get it back cause the thief was spending less than my wife. YT comment.

johnn · Jan 9, 2022

johnn · Feb 11, 2022

A woman is at home when she hears someone knocking at her door.
She goes to the door opens it and sees a man standing there.
He asks the lady, "Do you have a Vagina?" She slams the door in disgust.

The next morning she hears a knock at the door, its the same man and he asks the same question to the woman, "Do you have a Vagina?"
She slams the door again.
Later that night when her husband gets home she tell him what has happened for the last two days. The husband tells his wife in a loving and concerned voice, "Honey, I am taking an off tomorrow so as to be home, just incase this guy shows up again."

The next morning they hear a knock at the door and both ran for the door.
The husband whisperes to the wife, "Honey, im going to hide behind the door and listen and if it is the same guy I want you to answer yes to the question because I want to a see where he's going with this."
She nods yes to her husband and opens the door.
Sure enough the same fellow is standing there, he asks, "Do you have a Vagina?" "Yes I do." says the lady.

The man replies, "Good, would you mind telling your husband to leave my wife's alone and start using yours!"

Zorg · Apr 27, 2022

johnn · Jan 6, 2022

Zorg · Mar 31, 2022

johnn · Jan 1, 2022

Cannuck · Jan 3, 2022

A new simplified income-tax form contains only four lines:

1. What was your income for the year?

2. What were your expenses?

3. How much do have you left?

4. Send it in.