The Everyone's Welcome Thread (even Canadians, SEO experts, and oldies..you get the idea).

[DU]

I thought I'd start a new break room thread. The great thing about this thread is you can say whatever the heck you want (except adult) and it's ON TOPIC.

All you have to do is post whatever is in your head when you are here. Simple.

Here are some acronyms we like to use:

YPSBT Your Post Sucks Big Time
YPITDB Your post is the dog's bollox
LPOD - Last Post of Day
FPOD - First....
SPOD - Second.
FPOTWN - Funny Post of the Week Nominee

Featured Friends
Johname - he doesn't have a cool nickname except johname. He is a legend. He is our local animation expect.
DU/Grace Delete aka __ aka Rickey (due to propensity to retire).
Iowa - Your source of gas prices, bacon futures, and stuff.
JBLions - Will teach you about mattress purchasing, beer, and how to remove birds from cages
Briguy Debartolo - More NP$ than everyone
Mis_Chiff - Fellow Canadian of Bri - she's a wild one
Lennco - He is lennco
Enlytend - I still read this enly--tend Adwords guru!
Verbster - The Alaskan Fisherman who hunts Right Wingers and Shoots Sh*t in more than one place
BaseballWorld - Muscle #2 (after JB)
David Walker - Semper Fi
Forge - Don't ask about this avatar
GILSAN - He posts photos. Cool ones. He also worships CR7 (if you don' t know who that is? you are advised to learn before engaging him in conversation)
JDAB - He has hot women on his new bed... but he worked hard for them
Rogue - Called Rouge more often than the movie Moulin Rouge
Cyberian - He goes by Cy. He's older than the forum. Likes the lakers and pops in sometimes to offer support and counselling.
NS - He doesn't look like the cartoons. He's an enigma. His avatar is usually hot.

SPECIAL SPECIAL GUESTS
Blobfish and girlfriend.

Grace Delete / DefaultUser / WorldsWorstDomainer will personally thank EVERY SINGLE post in this thread UNTIL someone says something about post count and gets too obsessed about reputations and starts gaming the system etc.

^ That has happened so no more ...was fun while it lasted.

Johname will personally LIKE every post in this thread until he doesn't

No racist, sexist, homophobic material that woudnt be acceptable in the 70s please.
We are ok with boobs and we are ok with men with abs (or whatever it is that makes them attractive). Ogling is healthy. Violence, not accepting that it is shallow and non-meaninful judge of people etc. is not. The most important virtue of this thread is respect for all.

Here are some topics that this thread has had:

The following subjects are
BANNED

So Kardashian related material is not allowed - even gratuitous boobs or bums because no one wants to see or hear about them.

POLITICS OF ANY KIND IS A NO NO.
Especially if it is demeaning to the liberal elite or the conservative morons.

I suppose Anarchy is ok

I AM PERSONALLY UNDECIDED ON SOME POLITICS so things like the below?
I think the crowd should decide.

We are also lady and animal friendly

 

[RogueWriter]

You will be like this old geezer in the senior citizens house, telling everyone:
Hey, I just found out I will be a grandfather!
hahahahhaha

Last month I told my oldest, "Look, no pressure, but if you start dating RIGHT NOW, get married in 3 years, and start having children, I might actually live to see one or two of them. But, no pressure." lol.

 

[briguy]

Just watched my first NBA game from start to finish..Raptors move onto to play the Golden State Warriors!!!!
Raptors first NBA finals...

 

[briguy]

 

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[iowadawg]

To beautify this thread a bit more:

 

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[iowadawg]

The other night, I was invited out for a night with "the guys." I told my wife that I would be home by midnight. "I promise," were my last words.

The hours passed and the beer and shooters went down way too easily and around 3 a.m. we piled into a cab and headed to our respective homes, quite inebriated.

Just as I walked through the door, the cuckoo clock in the hall started up and cuckooed 3 times!

Realizing that my wife would probably wake up to this, I quickly cuckooed another 9 times. I was quit pleased with myself for coming up with such a quick witted solution to cover up my tardiness. Even with my impaired judgment, I could count 3 cuckoos plus 9 cuckoos equaled 12 cuckoos!

The next morning, my wife asked me what time I got in, and confidently, I replied, "Midnight...like I promised." She didn't even raise an eyebrow and went on reading the morning paper! Phew! Got away with that one!

After a moment, she then replied, "I think we might need a new cuckoo clock."

A bit nervously, I asked her why, to which she responded:

"Well, last night our clock cuckooed 3 times, then said, 'Oh, crap,' cuckooed 4 more times, cleared it's throat, cuckooed another 3 times, giggled, cuckooed twice more, then tripped over the coffee table, belched, burped and then farted."

 

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[iowadawg]

A man and a woman are sitting beside each other in the first class section of the plane.

The woman sneezes, takes a tissue, gently wipes her nose, and shudders quite violently in her seat.

The man isn't sure why she is shuddering and goes back to reading.

A few minutes pass. The woman sneezes again. She takes a tissue, gently wipes her nose and shudders quite violently in her seat.

The man is becoming more and more curious about the shuddering.

A few more minutes pass. The woman sneezes yet again. She takes a tissue, gently wipes her nose and shudders violently again.

The man has finally had all he can handle. He turns to the woman and says, "Three times you've sneezed and three times you've taken a tissue and wiped your nose then shuddered violently!

Are you sending me signals, or are you going crazy?"

The woman replies, "I'm sorry if I disturbed you. I have a rare condition and when I sneeze, I have an orgasm."

The man, now feeling a little embarrassed but even more curious says, "I've never heard of that before. What are you taking for it?"

The woman looks at him and says, "Pepper."

 

[iowadawg]

Three guys found themselves in Hell: we will call them Carl, Bob, and Brett. They were a little confused at their present situation, and they were startled to see a door in the wall open. Behind the door was perhaps the ugliest woman they had ever seen. She was 3'4", dirty, and you could smell her even over the Brimstone.

The voice of the Devil was heard, "Brett, you have sinned! You are condemned to spend the rest of eternity in bed with this woman!" And Brett was whisked through the door by a group of lesser demons to his torment.

This understandably shook up the other two, and so they both jumped when a second door opened, and they saw an even more disgusting example of womanhood gone wrong. She was over 7' tall, monstrous, covered in thick black hair, and flies circled her.

The voice of the Devil was heard, "Carl, you have sinned! You are condemned to spend the rest of eternity in bed with this woman!" And Carl, like Brett, was whisked off.

Bob, now alone, felt understandably anxious, and feared the worst when the third door opened. And as the door inched open, he strained to see the figure of ... Cindy Crawford. Delighted, Bob jumped up, taking in the sight of this beautiful woman, barely dressed in a skimpy bikini. Then he heard the voice of the Devil saying:

Cindy, you have sinned ........

 

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[briguy]

Hard act to follow..but

 

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[iowadawg]

See who gets offended at this one....hahahahahhaaha

 

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[briguy]

 

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[briguy]