Funny Things Said In Court

[dgridley]

Found these here:

http://rinkworks.com/said/courtroom.shtml


Lawyer: "This myasthenia gravis -- does it affect your memory at all?"
Witness: "Yes."
Lawyer: "And in what ways does it affect your memory?"
Witness: "I forget."
Lawyer: "You forget. Can you give us an example of something that you've forgotten?"

Lawyer: "How old is your son, the one living with you?"
Witness: "Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which."
Lawyer: "How long has he lived with you?"
Witness: "Forty-five years."

Lawyer: "What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke that morning?"
Witness: "He said, 'Where am I, Cathy?'"
Lawyer: "And why did that upset you?"
Witness: "My name is Susan."

Lawyer: "Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?"
Witness: "No."
Lawyer: "Did you check for blood pressure?"
Witness: "No."
Lawyer: "Did you check for breathing?"
Witness: "No."
Lawyer: "So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?"
Witness: "No."
Lawyer: "How can you be so sure, Doctor?"
Witness: "Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar."
Lawyer: "But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?"
Witness: "Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere."

 

[NPQueen]

:D You always find the best things to post in the Break Room!! Thanks so much for the laugh! Rep Sent!

 

[dgridley]

Thanks.. that's why they pay me the Big Bucks

Lots more funny things people said here: http://rinkworks.com/said/

 

[Genialnames]

I have come across a similar some time ago, I couldn't stop laugh.
You got me laugh again.
thanks dgridley!

 

[01wojtowicz]

lol ,,, the best 1 is :

Lawyer: "Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?"
Witness: "No."
Lawyer: "Did you check for blood pressure?"
Witness: "No."
Lawyer: "Did you check for breathing?"
Witness: "No."
Lawyer: "So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?"
Witness: "No."
Lawyer: "How can you be so sure, Doctor?"
Witness: "Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar."
Lawyer: "But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?"
Witness: "Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere."

 

[srijit]

yeah... that one is the best :D

 

[Invictus]

Great ones! I wonder if any of them are actually said in court :P

Anymore?

 

[Rainbow]

It's a good one! Thanks for making me laugh!

 

[gchick]

:lol:great jokes dude!