“Unix is user-friendly. It’s just very selective about who its friends are.”
“There are 10 types of people in the world: those who understand binary, and those who don’t.”
“Men are from Mars. Women are from Venus. Computers are from hell.”
“SUPERCOMPUTER: what it sounded like before you bought it.”
“I’m not anti-social; I’m just not user friendly”
“A printer consists of three main parts: the case, the jammed paper tray and the blinking red light”
“A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila”
“1f u c4n r34d th1s u r34lly n33d t0 g37 l41d”
“To go forward, you must backup.”
“I would love to change the world, but they won’t give me the source code”
“A Windows user spends 1/3 of his life sleeping, 1/3 working, 1/3 waiting.”
“My software never has bugs. It just develops random features.”
“Better to be a geek than an idiot.”
“Windows isn’t a virus, viruses do something.”
“Difference between a virus and windows ? Viruses rarely fail.”
“Evolution is God’s way of issuing upgrades.”
“The only problem with troubleshooting is that sometimes trouble shoots back.”
“It’s a little-known fact that the Y1K problem caused the Dark Ages.”
“The box said ‘Required Windows 95 or better’. So, I installed LINUX.”
“Computer are like air conditioners: they stop working when you open windows.”
“Mac users swear by their Mac,
PC users swear at their PC.”
“Like car accidents, most hardware problems are due to driver error.”
“Dating a girl is just like writing software. Everything’s going to work just fine in the testing lab (dating), but as soon as you have contract with a customer (marriage), then your program (life) is going to be facing new situations you never expected. You’ll be forced to patch the code (admit you’re wrong) and then the code (wife) will just end up all bloated and unmaintainable in the end.”
“There are 10 kinds of people in the world, those that understand trinary, those that don’t, and those that confuse it with binary.”
“If you give someone a program, you will frustrate them for a day; if you teach them how to program, you will frustrate them for a lifetime.”
“It is easier to change the specification to fit the program than vice versa.”
“I had a fortune cookie the other day and it said: ‘Outlook not so good’. I said: ‘Sure, but Microsoft ships it anyway’.”
“The nice thing about standards is that there are so many to choose from.”
“The term reboot comes from the middle age (before computers). Horses who stopped in mid-stride required a boot to the rear to start again. Thus the term to rear-boot, later abbreviated into reboot.”
“Programmers are tools for converting caffeine into code.”
“The great thing about Object Oriented code is that it can make small, simple problems look like large, complex ones.”
“Hacking is like sex. You get in, you get out, and hope that you didn’t leave something that can be traced back to you.”
Enjoy
“There are 10 types of people in the world: those who understand binary, and those who don’t.”
“Men are from Mars. Women are from Venus. Computers are from hell.”
“SUPERCOMPUTER: what it sounded like before you bought it.”
“I’m not anti-social; I’m just not user friendly”
“A printer consists of three main parts: the case, the jammed paper tray and the blinking red light”
“A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila”
“1f u c4n r34d th1s u r34lly n33d t0 g37 l41d”
“To go forward, you must backup.”
“I would love to change the world, but they won’t give me the source code”
“A Windows user spends 1/3 of his life sleeping, 1/3 working, 1/3 waiting.”
“My software never has bugs. It just develops random features.”
“Better to be a geek than an idiot.”
“Windows isn’t a virus, viruses do something.”
“Difference between a virus and windows ? Viruses rarely fail.”
“Evolution is God’s way of issuing upgrades.”
“The only problem with troubleshooting is that sometimes trouble shoots back.”
“It’s a little-known fact that the Y1K problem caused the Dark Ages.”
“The box said ‘Required Windows 95 or better’. So, I installed LINUX.”
“Computer are like air conditioners: they stop working when you open windows.”
“Mac users swear by their Mac,
PC users swear at their PC.”
“Like car accidents, most hardware problems are due to driver error.”
“Dating a girl is just like writing software. Everything’s going to work just fine in the testing lab (dating), but as soon as you have contract with a customer (marriage), then your program (life) is going to be facing new situations you never expected. You’ll be forced to patch the code (admit you’re wrong) and then the code (wife) will just end up all bloated and unmaintainable in the end.”
“There are 10 kinds of people in the world, those that understand trinary, those that don’t, and those that confuse it with binary.”
“If you give someone a program, you will frustrate them for a day; if you teach them how to program, you will frustrate them for a lifetime.”
“It is easier to change the specification to fit the program than vice versa.”
“I had a fortune cookie the other day and it said: ‘Outlook not so good’. I said: ‘Sure, but Microsoft ships it anyway’.”
“The nice thing about standards is that there are so many to choose from.”
“The term reboot comes from the middle age (before computers). Horses who stopped in mid-stride required a boot to the rear to start again. Thus the term to rear-boot, later abbreviated into reboot.”
“Programmers are tools for converting caffeine into code.”
“The great thing about Object Oriented code is that it can make small, simple problems look like large, complex ones.”
“Hacking is like sex. You get in, you get out, and hope that you didn’t leave something that can be traced back to you.”
Enjoy
