I have sold 3 from 3 now from simply writing an email to a "potential" end client.
As a previous poster has stated, the earlier template is too long and full of too many translated attempts at formality.
I go for:
Hi,
I own the domain name xxxxxxxxxxxxx and having found you on Google as having a similar name/being within an appropriate niche, wonder if you'd be interested in having this transfered to you for a small fee.
Please let me know at the earliest opportunity before I list the domain to a wider audience.
Best regards