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Hmm I like this concept, I see where you're going with it, but readability is lacking. If the distance between the T/O and the O/R were similar to what is currently between S/T I think it would be more readable. Right now I can only tell it says story because I know it's meant to, but I think it would be a struggle for a first time viewer.
I don't love your second submission, I've given this feedback to someone else before you but eyes in a logo make me think of surveillance which is a negative direction.
Here is my design idea. Here I have used custom fonts to portray story telling.
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The story of successShow attachment 117083
Show attachment 117123
Some colour options to emphasise the wonder and magic of narratives and stories.