Beware of PHP!

[PolurNET]

Student Suspended Over
Suspected Use of PHP
By Brian Briggs


Topeka, KS - High school sophomore Brett Tyson was suspended today after teachers learned he may be using PHP.

"A teacher overheard him say that he was using PHP, and as part of our Zero-Tolerance policy against drug use, he was immediately suspended. No questions asked," said Principal Clyde Thurlow. "We're not quite sure what PHP is, but we suspect it may be a derivative of PCP, or maybe a new designer drug like GHB."

Parents are frightened by the discovery of this new menace in their children's school, and are demanding the school do something. "We heard that he found out about PHP at school on the internet. There may even be a PHP web ring operating on school grounds," said irate parent Carol Blessing. "School is supposed to be teaching our kids how to read and write. Not about dangerous drugs like PHP."

In response to parental demands the school has reconfigured its internet WatchDog software to block access to all internet sites mentioning PHP. Officials say this should prevent any other students from falling prey like Brett Tyson did. They have also stepped up locker searches and brought in drug sniffing dogs.

Interviews with students suggested that PHP use is wide spread around the school, but is particularly concentrated in the geeky nerd population. When contacted by BBspot.com, Brett Tyson said, "I don't know what the hell is going on dude, but this suspension gives me more time for fraggin'. Yee haw!"

PHP is a hypertext preprocessor, which sounds very dangerous. It is believed that many users started by using Perl and moved on to the more powerful PHP. For more information on how to recognize if your child may be using PHP please visit http://www.php.net.

:lol: it cracked me up :p

 

[PolurNET]

Another JOKE! :D

A new M$ Word Logo?

.
.
.
.
.

Next time, y'all know what Word's good for... 8^X

 

[Scott]

:lol: :hehe:

 

[jstep]

:P

good stuff

 

[HFear]

Haha, nice one Anand!

 

[PolurNET]

hehe thanks guys :p I'll think of more :blink:

 

[anthonyjdoe]

:lol:

 

[PolurNET]

hehe i'm on a joke role

:hehe: another good one
-------------------------------

ok, few days ago, I received an e-mail from someone in my Computer Science Department...

Subject: [For Sale] Coursework Stress

Husband (A computer Science Professor) returning late from work:

Husband: "Hi dear. I'm logged in"
Wife: Have you brought the grocery?
Husband: Bad command or file name
wife: But I told you in the morning ?
Husband: Erroneous syntax. Abort, retry, cancel?
Wife: What about my new TV ?
Husband: Variable not found
Wife: At least, give me your credit card. I need to do some shopping
Husband: Sharing violation. Access denied
Wife: It was a great mistake that I married an idiot like you
Husband: Data type mismatch
Wife: You are useless
Husband: By default
Wife: What about your salary ?
Husband: File in use. Try after some time
Wife: Who was in the car this morning ?
Husband: System is unstable. Press ALT + CTRL + DEL to reboot
Wife: Are you going to have some snacks ?
Husband: File system full
Wife: What is the relation between you and your receptionist ?
Husband: only user with WRITE permission
Wife: What is my value in this family ?
Husband: Unknown virus
Wife: Do you love me or your computer or you're being just funny ?
Husband: Too many parameters !
Wife: I will go to my dad's house.
Husband: This program has performed an illegal operation and will be
terminated
Wife: I'll leave you forever
Husband: Close all programs and logout and then login as another user
Wife: It's worthless talking to you
Husband: Shutdown the computer
Wife: I'm going
Husband: It's now safe to turn off your computer

:yell: :ghost:

 

[The Equivocate]

Polur, did that come from The Onion? It just sounds like an Onion-type article.

 

[PolurNET]

Polur, did that come from The Onion? It just sounds like an Onion-type article.

Nope, found one of them on my friend's joke site, didn't ask him where he got it from... Dunno what The Onion is

 

[Lord]

damn! the first one if it was real, i would hve laugehd my arse off :p

 

[ichibaka]

yeah who woulda think people could be addictive and dangerous

 

[suthra]

ha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha haha ha
Funny Thanks

 

[Nunim]

:lol: it cracked me up :p

I think my teachers would believe PHP is a drug... They're not computer friendly....And I am in college.... Ahhh!!!

 

[Qwert]

:lol:

 

[988]

ahahah

 

[True_Snake]

:lol:

Thanks Anand. The jokes are funny
I need those laughs.


True_Snake

 

[PolurNET]

:hehe: glad you all liked it

 

[webscorpion]

Very hilarious

Stress-relieving. Thanks.

 

[Anthony]

That WORD graphic was really funny!