- Impact
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My NamePros Compatriots,
I am writing this on the 12th of March, 2010. And I write these words with sadness in my heart for I know that this has to be done and it is out of my sphere of control. A few of you were told of this, in private messages, long ago but now, I’m going to make the announcement public. But even those who had prior knowledge of my endeavor may not understand the reasoning of my decision or more so, why I chose to postpone the inevitable until this very moment. This, of course, is explained below.
I’ve written one novel, back in 2006. It was to be revised and sold by early 2007 but my life had undergone many twists and perils. To this day, the book has yet to be published. (To note: I’ve also written a chapbook in 2002 that due to my displeasure of the material, is not in print. I am working on a second chapbook at the present.) As of last summer, I’ve been working on a second novel. It should have surpassed 500 pages at this point but the perils of the last six months had limited me to great lengths. Two events in August-September tore at me greatly and by the thirty-first of October, I nearly snapped. I kept myself in isolation, being alone in an apartment--without so much as taking a step outside or pulling the blinds up--for twenty-four hours a day, usually through full one-or-two week spans. I slowly deteriorated and day by day, I regressed, becoming dehumanized and psychotic. I decided at that time to put this endeavor into play. But like most addictions, I couldn’t let go of domaining or the numerous three-figure sales I was making through it.
But now, I have no choice.
I am an unwedded man, aged twenty-seven years, from Ohio, USA. But I am a man of convictions, of complexity... and I’m enveloped in melancholy. It is a sadness that I carry, the burden of being who I am. For those who do not know me: I am a sufferer of a disease known as type-2 neurofibromatosis. I have bilateral deafness and imperfect vision. From 1999 to now, I’ve undergone some rather gruesome operations (I’ve had close to two dozen incisions performed on various places on my body) and I will not descend into falsified pretence: I will never get better. The gene that causes my disease had been discovered a few years ago and medical researches are trying to find a way to cure this. Whether I benefit from this or not is unknown but the fact remains that I have as I have. As well, I have my doubts of a miracle.
Adding to this sordid picture, I’ve lived one hell of a strange life. I’ve went through adversaries, as I’m sure you all have, throughout my life but as Ozzy Osbourne so aptly put it, the wreckage of my past keep haunting me. It has gotten worse lately and, I’m afraid, it’s not going to recede if I sit here and hold all of this in. I’m growing bitter. I’m hating myself with such an acute severity. But it’s an enormity I bear for holding back, after all these years. I’ve wanted to write my life’s story out. I’ve planned on doing this after my high-school graduation. It, unfortunately, never happened. And my neglect of not writing my memoirs out is gnawing at me and the misery it encompasses is growing all the more extreme. I cannot even sit and stare at a wall without a memory, whether of bliss or perdition, enveloping me. I feel as though the past is suffocating me. I’ve tried to run from it to no avail. My only redemption is to face it.
I cannot and will not put my current book on hiatus and I plan to write my memoir and my current book concurrently. I require more time to achieve this feat and since I use up a great deal of time with domaining, it seems imperative to me that I hang up the proverbial towel and call it a career. With this, I have no other sufficient options but to announce my retirement from the domain industry. The newfound time will be used to write on both of these stories (and my second chapbook). Assuming I can recover the draft of my first book, I shall give it a proper revision and then seek out an agent for the manuscript. I’ll have a lot on my plate and will need more time. This is the only choice I have aside from placing some of these projects on shelf; this, of course, is being written out of the equation.
Please do not take this as me saying that I am not of sound mind or that I’m suffering from a mental instability. I am neither mentally ill nor insane. But I carry this burden--my past--and I know that the only way I’ll be able to put this burden to rest is by facing it. I’m old enough to understand that and mature enough to act upon it.
There are chances that I might pop in here time and time again to engage in discussion and I might buy/sell a domain here and there, if I feel but for the most part, I’m out. I will hold a fire-sale of my domains in a day or 2. They will all need to be sold and I’m willing to part with them cheap so as to liquidate my portfolio quicker.
I’ll miss this. I’ve been a domainer since around 2002 and have many fond memories here at NP. I’ll write out a short good-bye upon my departure; this letter was simply to announce my retirement from domaining and to alert you of my soon-to-be-held fire-sale. I wish you all luck and I shall remain here, in NP, for another week, during which I’ll conduct my sale.
With all due respect,
Randy L. Pendleton
PS I owe one of you money. You know who you are. That will be dealt with accordingly.
I am writing this on the 12th of March, 2010. And I write these words with sadness in my heart for I know that this has to be done and it is out of my sphere of control. A few of you were told of this, in private messages, long ago but now, I’m going to make the announcement public. But even those who had prior knowledge of my endeavor may not understand the reasoning of my decision or more so, why I chose to postpone the inevitable until this very moment. This, of course, is explained below.
I’ve written one novel, back in 2006. It was to be revised and sold by early 2007 but my life had undergone many twists and perils. To this day, the book has yet to be published. (To note: I’ve also written a chapbook in 2002 that due to my displeasure of the material, is not in print. I am working on a second chapbook at the present.) As of last summer, I’ve been working on a second novel. It should have surpassed 500 pages at this point but the perils of the last six months had limited me to great lengths. Two events in August-September tore at me greatly and by the thirty-first of October, I nearly snapped. I kept myself in isolation, being alone in an apartment--without so much as taking a step outside or pulling the blinds up--for twenty-four hours a day, usually through full one-or-two week spans. I slowly deteriorated and day by day, I regressed, becoming dehumanized and psychotic. I decided at that time to put this endeavor into play. But like most addictions, I couldn’t let go of domaining or the numerous three-figure sales I was making through it.
But now, I have no choice.
I am an unwedded man, aged twenty-seven years, from Ohio, USA. But I am a man of convictions, of complexity... and I’m enveloped in melancholy. It is a sadness that I carry, the burden of being who I am. For those who do not know me: I am a sufferer of a disease known as type-2 neurofibromatosis. I have bilateral deafness and imperfect vision. From 1999 to now, I’ve undergone some rather gruesome operations (I’ve had close to two dozen incisions performed on various places on my body) and I will not descend into falsified pretence: I will never get better. The gene that causes my disease had been discovered a few years ago and medical researches are trying to find a way to cure this. Whether I benefit from this or not is unknown but the fact remains that I have as I have. As well, I have my doubts of a miracle.
Adding to this sordid picture, I’ve lived one hell of a strange life. I’ve went through adversaries, as I’m sure you all have, throughout my life but as Ozzy Osbourne so aptly put it, the wreckage of my past keep haunting me. It has gotten worse lately and, I’m afraid, it’s not going to recede if I sit here and hold all of this in. I’m growing bitter. I’m hating myself with such an acute severity. But it’s an enormity I bear for holding back, after all these years. I’ve wanted to write my life’s story out. I’ve planned on doing this after my high-school graduation. It, unfortunately, never happened. And my neglect of not writing my memoirs out is gnawing at me and the misery it encompasses is growing all the more extreme. I cannot even sit and stare at a wall without a memory, whether of bliss or perdition, enveloping me. I feel as though the past is suffocating me. I’ve tried to run from it to no avail. My only redemption is to face it.
I cannot and will not put my current book on hiatus and I plan to write my memoir and my current book concurrently. I require more time to achieve this feat and since I use up a great deal of time with domaining, it seems imperative to me that I hang up the proverbial towel and call it a career. With this, I have no other sufficient options but to announce my retirement from the domain industry. The newfound time will be used to write on both of these stories (and my second chapbook). Assuming I can recover the draft of my first book, I shall give it a proper revision and then seek out an agent for the manuscript. I’ll have a lot on my plate and will need more time. This is the only choice I have aside from placing some of these projects on shelf; this, of course, is being written out of the equation.
Please do not take this as me saying that I am not of sound mind or that I’m suffering from a mental instability. I am neither mentally ill nor insane. But I carry this burden--my past--and I know that the only way I’ll be able to put this burden to rest is by facing it. I’m old enough to understand that and mature enough to act upon it.
There are chances that I might pop in here time and time again to engage in discussion and I might buy/sell a domain here and there, if I feel but for the most part, I’m out. I will hold a fire-sale of my domains in a day or 2. They will all need to be sold and I’m willing to part with them cheap so as to liquidate my portfolio quicker.
I’ll miss this. I’ve been a domainer since around 2002 and have many fond memories here at NP. I’ll write out a short good-bye upon my departure; this letter was simply to announce my retirement from domaining and to alert you of my soon-to-be-held fire-sale. I wish you all luck and I shall remain here, in NP, for another week, during which I’ll conduct my sale.
With all due respect,
Randy L. Pendleton
PS I owe one of you money. You know who you are. That will be dealt with accordingly.
