The Everyone's Welcome Thread (even Canadians, SEO experts, and oldies..you get the idea).

HotKey said:

Flaming Doritos.

Yesterday, had daughter's 10th bday here at the house. 8 screaming girls, complete chaos. Ran out to grab a pizza. What could have possible gone wrong, while I was away?

Came back, wife is going ballistic, girls are all hysterical. Pretty much same state as when I left. But to add to the excitement, apparently the Doritos had spontaneously went up in flames. The girls had went to eat some, noticed smoke and a flame coming from them. They blew on the Doritos, made it worse, and then threw the whole Doritos bowl in the pool.

Well that took care of that. Mom did not see any of it (she was trying to stop the dog from eating all the slime the girls had just made) but she nearly had a fit. Bunch of girls running screaming fire! fire! through the yard is tough to handle calmly, I'd imagine. Did I mention luckily I wasn't there?

But question is, how the heck do Doritos spontaneously ignite?? The girls all swore they witnessed it. Well, it was sunny out. It was hot. The chips were in a stainless steel bowl. The girls said they noticed the sun reflecting very brightly from the bowl. So there ya have it. Heat+metal+chips = edible campfire?

**

From tennis match yesterday, we're sorry even when we win:
“I know you guys wanted Serena to win, so I’m so sorry!”

The most Canadian way to accept a trophy? Bianca Andreescu says 'sorry'

**

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JB Lions said:

Hectic week, think I'm back to my normal routine now, got everything cleared. This is all in the last week.

Dog passed away, it was expected. He was very old. Never easy losing a pet.

Got attic insulated today, apparently there was not enough, got that out of the way.

Usually renewed my registration online, couldn't do it this time. 10 years you also need to get a new plate. Thought I would have to go hang out at the DMV. Found out while I can't do it online, could do it thru the mail, so saved me a trip.

While driving, my shifter went out. Luckily, not too far from home, pushed it to the driveway. My mechanic came out and fixed it, only $120. Wrote 2 long pages of what he did. Know a lot of mechanics, older than me. Friends of family/father who were into classic cars. So have a lot of good connections in that area. Thought I would have to get it towed somewhere and deal with mechanics I don't know. But it was able to be fixed in my garage.

Thought I was going to lose a deal because of those KYC laws, Escrow site problems, got wire today. So that turned out good.

Was thinking that hurricane might hit, dodged it. Still hurricane season so you never know.

So now, back to normal, hopefully.

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briguy said:

Insulation in the attic? Figured in your neck of woods, insulation not a necessity.

Sorry, about the loss of your loved one.

NFL season started...According to what I been reading the Patriots are a heavy favorite/favourite for the Super Bowl..

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JB Lions said:

Had some condensation around where the air comes out, kind of building up. Also, when the AC shut off, you can kind of feel the hot air from the attic coming thru. And it looks like there wasn't much up there, they took pictures. I think I also need to get some vents put in the roof in certain areas, for more release.

Yep, Pats are the favorites yet again. If they stay healthy, they'll be hard to beat.

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briguy said:

RETIRED HUSBAND After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to WalMart. Unfortunately, like most men; I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she loves to browse.
Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter, from the local WalMart: Dear Mrs. Harris: Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion, in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to, ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Harris, are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras:
1. June 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people's carts when they weren't looking.
2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom.
4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, 'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away'. This caused the employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that in turn resulted with a union grievance, causing management to lose time and costing the company money. We don't have a Code 3. 5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&Ms on layaway.
6. August 14: Moved a, 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the children shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department to which twenty children obliged.
8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' EMTs were called.
9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.
10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.
11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while, loudly humming the, 'Mission Impossible' theme.
12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his, 'Madonna Look' using different sizes of funnels.
13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'
14. October 22: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed; 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'
15. Took a box of condoms to the checkout clerk and asked where is the fitting room? And last, but not least:
16. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile; then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here.' One of the clerks passed out.

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LOL.... This was brilliant... I'll bet the old fart is gonna miss his trips to WalMart!