Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?

**Gene** · 06-28-2008, 06:15 AM

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?

BARACK OBAMA:
The chicken crossed the road because
it was time for a change! The chicken wanted change!

JOHN MC CAIN:
My friends, that chicken crossed the
road because he recognized the need to engage in
cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on
the other side of the road.

HILLARY CLINTON:
When I was First Lady, I personally
helped that little chicken to cross the road. This
experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure
right from Day One! that every chicken in this
country gets the chance it deserves to cross the
road. But then, this really isn't about me.

GEORGE W. BUSH:
We don't really care why the chicken
crossed the road. We just want to know if the
chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The
chicken is either against us, or for us. There
is no middle ground here.

DICK CHENEY:
Where's my gun?

COLIN POWELL:
Now to the left of the screen, you can
clearly see the satellite image of the chicken
crossing the road.

BILL CLINTON:
I did not cross the road with that
chicken... What is your definition of chicken?

AL GORE:
I invented the chicken.

JOHN KERRY:
Although I voted to let the
chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It
was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about
the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now,
and will remain against it.

AL SHARPTON:
Why are all the chickens white? We need
some black chickens.

DR. PHIL:
The problem we have here is that this
chicken won't realize that he must first deal with
the problem on this side of the road before it goes
after the problem on the other side of the road.
What we need to do is help him realize how stupid
he's acting by not taking on his current problems
before adding new problems.

OPRAH:
Well, I understand that the chicken is having
problems, which is why he wants to cross this road
so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from
his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of
life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that
he can just drive across the road and not live his
life like the rest of the chickens.

ANDERSON COOPER, CNN:
We have reason to believe there
is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed
to have access to the other side of the road.

NANCY GRACE:
That chicken crossed the road because
he's guilty! You can see it in his eyes and the way
he walks.

PAT BUCHANAN:
To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

MARTHA STEWART:
No one called me to warn me which way that chicken
was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's
Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a
certain level. No little bird gave me any insider
information.

DR SEUSS:
Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with
a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, But why it
crossed I've not been told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY:
To die in the rain, alone.

JERRY FALWELL:
Because the chicken was gay! Can't you people see the
plain truth? That's why they call it the 'other side.'
Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And if you eat
that chicken, you will become gay, too. I say we
boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination
that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless
phrases like 'the other side.' That chicken should not be
crossing the road. It's as plain and as simple as
that.

GRANDPA:
In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road.
Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that
was good enough.

BARBARA WALTERS:
Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be
listening to the chicken tell, for the first time,
the heartwarming story of how it experienced a serious
case of molting, and went on to accomplish its lifelong
dream of crossing the road.

ARISTOTLE:
It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

JOHN LENNON:
Imagine all the chickens in the world
crossing roads together, in peace.

BILL GATES:
I have just released eChicken2008, which will
not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your
important documents, and balance your checkbook.
Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken2008.
This new platform is much more stable and will never cra…#@&&^(C%..........reboot.

ALBERT EINSTEIN:
Or did the road move beneath the chicken?

COLONEL SANDERS:
Did I miss one?

.

tekz999 · 06-28-2008, 06:24 AM

"ALBERT EINSTEIN:
Or did the road move beneath the chicken?"

hgahahahha

GILSAN · 06-28-2008, 06:30 AM

Absolutely Brilliant!!

The best I've seen in a long long time! Should be nominated for the Chick... err, post of the year!

GIL

mathiasc · 06-28-2008, 07:01 AM

that was hilarious

holyroller · 06-28-2008, 09:10 AM

Thanks

very funny

**-Nick-** · 06-28-2008, 11:00 AM

This is very nice

different perspectives of looking

Shane · 06-28-2008, 01:41 PM

ROFL that is an extremely funny list

Barefoottech · 06-28-2008, 02:23 PM

I love it
Gene , May i quote it on Chicken-or-the-egg.com

WGS_Thunder · 06-28-2008, 02:33 PM

ERNEST HEMINGWAY:
To die in the rain, alone.
My favorite

**mis_chiff** · 06-28-2008, 02:33 PM

Quote:

NANCY GRACE:
That chicken crossed the road because
he's guilty! You can see it in his eyes and the way
he walks.

LMAO!

**Gene** · 06-28-2008, 03:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Barefoottech

I love it
Gene , May i quote it on Chicken-or-the-egg.com

Of course... but I don't have the right to grant permission. Got it from a friend who got it from a friend who got it from a friend...

Mike · 06-28-2008, 04:52 PM

Beyond hilarious!

Great Post!

M.

Hurley4540 · 06-28-2008, 04:57 PM

Omg repped.

Barefoottech · 06-28-2008, 05:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gene

Of course... but I don't have the right to grant permission. Got it from a friend who got it from a friend who got it from a friend...

Oh ,OK
No Worries

SnarkyTech · 06-28-2008, 08:02 PM

haha this was great! Thanks for the funnies.

Dave in Carthage · 06-28-2008, 08:32 PM

Funny! But which crossed the road first? The chicken or the egg?

htmlindex · 06-29-2008, 12:47 AM

That was great!

Phoebe_ · 06-29-2008, 06:10 PM

How about Hamlet?

To be! or not to be!, I need to cross... lol

weblord · 06-29-2008, 06:12 PM

to get to the other side?

**mellowmasher** · 06-29-2008, 10:00 PM

Great post.....

otiduso · 06-29-2008, 10:10 PM

oprah is much too nice. eat the chicken!

AndyR · 06-30-2008, 05:42 AM

Linus Torvalds

To get the 'free sauce'

excuse my abysmal pun, andy

-Raja- · 06-30-2008, 01:16 PM

Simply Outstanding post

Repped!!

PolurNET · 06-30-2008, 03:45 PM

ROFL, that just made my day

! Great post, thanks Gene!

JanineXD · 06-30-2008, 07:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gene

Of course... but I don't have the right to grant permission. Got it from a friend who got it from a friend who got it from a friend...

lol.

the funniest imo is
ALBERT EINSTEIN:
Or did the road move beneath the chicken?

haha.
made me smile =]

thnx gene!

06-28-2008, 06:15 AM	#1 (permalink)
Gene DomainersUniversity.com Team Leader Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Oswego, NY Posts: 4,718 96.11 NP$ (Donate)	Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road? Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? BARACK OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road because it was time for a change! The chicken wanted change! JOHN MC CAIN: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road. HILLARY CLINTON: When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure right from Day One! that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn't about me. GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here. DICK CHENEY: Where's my gun? COLIN POWELL: Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road. BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken... What is your definition of chicken? AL GORE: I invented the chicken. JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it. AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens. DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before it goes after the problem on the other side of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his current problems before adding new problems. OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens. ANDERSON COOPER, CNN: We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road. NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he's guilty! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks. PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American. MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information. DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, But why it crossed I've not been told. ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain, alone. JERRY FALWELL: Because the chicken was gay! Can't you people see the plain truth? That's why they call it the 'other side.' Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And if you eat that chicken, you will become gay, too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like 'the other side.' That chicken should not be crossing the road. It's as plain and as simple as that. GRANDPA: In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough. BARBARA WALTERS: Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heartwarming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its lifelong dream of crossing the road. ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road. JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace. BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken2008, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken2008. This new platform is much more stable and will never cra…#@&&^(C%..........reboot. ALBERT EINSTEIN: Or did the road move beneath the chicken? COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one? . __________________ . . ◊ ◊ ◊..Learn from the Experts for free at DomainersUniversity.com..◊ ◊ ◊ Last edited by Gene; 06-28-2008 at 09:34 AM.

06-28-2008, 06:24 AM	#2 (permalink)
tekz999 Just got my 6th star! Join Date: Jun 2003 Posts: 2,554 66.10 NP$ (Donate)	"ALBERT EINSTEIN: Or did the road move beneath the chicken?" hgahahahha __________________ $250 Massive Facebook Application Script! Now with Super Rewards too! ☆☆ 300+ "Pick Out The Cherries" 3 & 4 Letters & Numbers Sale! Ego.us & More! ☆☆

06-28-2008, 06:30 AM	#3 (permalink)
GILSAN Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2007 Location: Madeira Island-Portugal Posts: 2,103 70.00 NP$ (Donate)	Absolutely Brilliant!! The best I've seen in a long long time! Should be nominated for the Chick... err, post of the year! GIL __________________ Madeira Island - Madeira Wine - Madeira Embroidery - Golf in Madeira - Affiliate Programs

06-28-2008, 07:01 AM	#4 (permalink)
mathiasc NamePros Regular Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Earth Posts: 859 983.45 NP$ (Donate)	that was hilarious __________________ Legitimate Online Jobs \| Work At Home Online Typing Jobs \| Winning Sports Bet \| Win Sports Bets \| Making Money Online

06-28-2008, 09:10 AM	#5 (permalink)
holyroller Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Orkney Posts: 1,330 1,153.00 NP$ (Donate)	Thanks very funny __________________ Discuss Societies Failings @ SocietySucks.com IronMaiden.tv - Ugly Kid Joe - Authentic Blues MusicArchive.tv - Music Video Archive Free Online Games

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06-28-2008, 11:00 AM	#6 (permalink)
-Nick- I'll do it Technical Services Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: India Posts: 6,434 5,169.80 NP$ (Donate)	This is very nice different perspectives of looking __________________ Vhuv\|Delq\|Fhur\|Twut\|Tluz\|Kegh\|Vhir\|Juhy\|Ruuz\|Jyos\|Jupt\|Vhek Webmaster Blog \| Software Downloads Sponsor Ads at SponAds.com

06-28-2008, 01:41 PM	#7 (permalink)
Shane NamePros Regular Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: West Sussex - England Posts: 858 10.00 NP$ (Donate)	ROFL that is an extremely funny list __________________ Get your handbook to success today! We show you how a recession benefits you! Like interviews? We have them by the van full! Be kind to Mellow Masher!!

06-28-2008, 02:23 PM	#8 (permalink)
Barefoottech The MINISITE King Join Date: May 2005 Location: With my WIFE Posts: 3,879 87.24 NP$ (Donate)	I love it Gene , May i quote it on Chicken-or-the-egg.com __________________ Domains \| HomeSite \| Aussie Outback BareFootTech has several High-Quality names for sale. Including the Legendary MiniSite.info (offers over 3.5KUSD) PM for details (

06-28-2008, 02:33 PM	#9 (permalink)
WGS_Thunder certified domainiac Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: IrateNation.com Posts: 1,388 134.05 NP$ (Donate)	ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain, alone. My favorite __________________ Irate Nation Irate Nation The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time, with the blood of patriots and tyrants. Thomas Jefferson

06-28-2008, 04:52 PM	#12 (permalink)
Mike NamePros Expert Join Date: May 2005 Location: www.chrome.us Posts: 5,245 46.20 NP$ (Donate)	Beyond hilarious! Great Post! M. __________________ Do you Chrome? [\|] Noomle No fees & More Revenue IntelBank.com<<Your Business & Your Money>>CreditHelp.TV American Pilot Center <- Learn to Fly -> PilotCenter

06-28-2008, 04:57 PM	#13 (permalink)
Hurley4540 Account Suspended Join Date: May 2003 Posts: 2,386 2,179.50 NP$ (Donate)	Omg repped.

06-28-2008, 08:02 PM	#15 (permalink)
SnarkyTech ******** Member Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: the East Coast Posts: 134 52.10 NP$ (Donate)	haha this was great! Thanks for the funnies.

06-28-2008, 08:32 PM	#16 (permalink)
Dave in Carthage www.daveincarthage.com Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: SW Missouri Posts: 17,881 2.01 NP$ (Donate)	Funny! But which crossed the road first? The chicken or the egg? __________________ GoDaddy Codes: Use Godaddy code OYH3 for $3 off your next .COM

06-29-2008, 12:47 AM	#17 (permalink)
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06-29-2008, 06:10 PM	#18 (permalink)
Phoebe_ Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2007 Posts: 2,191 10.00 NP$ (Donate)	How about Hamlet? To be! or not to be!, I need to cross... lol __________________ Professional Web Design and Development Services! ICQ:492-728-092 AIM:wickedclarisse

06-29-2008, 10:00 PM	#20 (permalink)
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06-30-2008, 03:45 PM	#24 (permalink)
PolurNET ₪NamePros Elite™ Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Kingston, Canada Posts: 2,963 365.30 NP$ (Donate)	ROFL, that just made my day ! Great post, thanks Gene! __________________ •• PolurNET Communications •• Avoid the Freeze, Enjoy the Breeze! = *A very* special day, February 12th = Proudly #1 on NamePros and WebHostingJury for over 3 years! \|\|LawPoint.org •• GREAT UK HOSTING DEALS NOW AT: ExcellentHost.com** ••

06-29-2008, 06:12 PM	#19 (permalink)
weblord NamePros Legend Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Philippines - www.Nabaza.com Posts: 19,840 21,700.43 NP$ (Donate)	to get to the other side?

06-29-2008, 10:10 PM	#21 (permalink)
otiduso Account Closed Join Date: Jun 2008 Posts: 14 0.00 NP$ (Donate)	oprah is much too nice. eat the chicken!

06-30-2008, 05:42 AM	#22 (permalink)
AndyR NamePros Regular Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: @andys.biz Posts: 712 3.28 NP$ (Donate)	Linus Torvalds To get the 'free sauce' excuse my abysmal pun, andy

06-30-2008, 01:16 PM	#23 (permalink)
-Raja- Senior Member Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: 17.20 N, 78.30 E Posts: 1,854 16.95 NP$ (Donate)	Simply Outstanding post Repped!! __________________ Read & Submit WebHosting Reviews and Check for the Latest Hosting Coupons & Codes

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