If you really must know.... :D. This is a long read from a forum game on another site. lol
I am a Christian eating my breakfast with my toes all wiggling everywhere! I think freedom is overrated. So I started writing silly songs with "Larry"! We first jotted down this great jingle and drank Monavie until we found it was made of cow hooves!
Larry started mooing and I took one more look at my toes and realized that I didn't know who Larry was! So I started singing "Tie Me Kangaroo Down Sport" by Rolf Harris.
Yes, I cheated but I asked Jesus to help Larry pick out a big, udderly strange banana skin. He told me to repent for my wrongdoing and my repentance was accepted immediately. We thought that it might help cure Larry's dredded skin disease. But alas it only cured half of his left leg. Meanwhile, he shopped online for more Monavie in bulk that... WAIT... is that really John Wayne? Doing the electric boogaloo? I must need glasses. Are pickles that aren't pickled really peaches? But WikiPedia is just too hard for Larry. So he calls Gary. Gary is Larry's barber. Who has known larry since they were kids. Since then they started singing in country intellect. Gary is worried that Larry may have Leukemia. Gary thinks Larry is having too many bloodys, in the British term that is "Frog's tongue" and Gary is getting tired of his 'ribbeting' nature so decided to meat. Larry had no clue that frogs are really cute. So he decided to listen carefully to the frog so he could imitate the noises and be like other frogs. Suddenly Gary started making noises that sounded just like Larry!
They both decided to eat at Bubba Gumps in Chicago and wait until they saw the first person wearing a large coconut on their head to start croaking loudly! They wanted to jump for joy when they actually saw the big dude come in with not only a coconut head, but also three little girls walking beside him carrying a frog, a squirrel, and a little dog! Larry and Gary began to sing "The Three Amigas" when all of a sudden the frog, squirrel and little dog jumped out of the little girl's arms and into a bowl of pudding!! It was chocolate pudding so they all started eating the pudding as fast as they could and when it was all gone they fell on the floor and couldn't move for five hours! So they took advantage of it and decided to just sleep it off for a while and then they could be frogs again.
Larry wondered where Gary went cuz he could not find him which is pretty unusual considering he was now flourescent green!! Suddenly, Larry turned into a frog and Pounced on a cat and shouted Hey! Look at me! The cat just grinned at him and went looking for his tinkle ball. Suddenly the cat started singing 'Can't Touch This' and Larry was croaking uncontrollably! When the cat finished.He jumped on the couch and did his best Elvis Presley impression. Larry was on top of Breezy's head purring contentedly while Crucifix was busy baking cookies for Gary. He was finished his culinary endeavours when breezy choked and freaked everyone out! She could not talk or get air so she hit a pan with her fists and pulled on her husband's beard, shocking him to death! He overcame the shock, but then did the Heimlech maneuver and saved Breezy's life. Crucifix, Rachel, and 4EverBlessed, screamed with joy and then headed over to Krispy Kremes to feed their feelings with three dozen donuts, ten chocolate milks, seven chocolate covered cream filled donuts, and a pot of hot coffee before they decided to head over to Crucifix's house to see if spdnet75 had gotten any new ideas from Breezy and decided to watch a bit of tv. They didn't know that Breezy had a comical few things planned so they were surprised when the t.v. exloded and a Dalek shouted "Elevate!" And every guest in the room started running and jumping on each other, much like an out of control riot! Breezy started praying asking them all to be careful, but they heard about a concert in the next town and Crucifix wanted to teach them a lesson about penance so they ended up going down to the Main St. Mission and volunteering for the day. Things were going great until 4EverBlessed began to weep uncontrollably at what she saw. JCgirl tried to comfort her, but nothing seemed to help so 4EverBlessed had a realization that God was in control and nobody seemed to care. But, some people seem to learn things the hard way and blame others for everything that happens to them and other people, and those people need to wake up and realize that with God all things are possible and can be conquered easily! It is a matter of allowing HIM to work in us. We need to recognize that we must let our wills decrease so HIS will can increase! Suddenly the lightning flashes, the thunder rolls and the cats climb all over Breezy; she starts giggling and everyone falls onto a huge storm and gets dunked into the sea from the raft, but mysteriously Crucifix manages to geteveryone saved from harm through his prayers! Melanie thinks he's walking on water, but he was really surfing on the back of a dolphin. It was quite spectular to watch!
We were all clapping and Gary and Larry (remember them) joined in and started holding out fish for the dolphin to eat. Seeing this, Gary and Larry began mooing and Crucifix and Breezy did the same thing. However, Breezy wasn't aware of Crucifix's vast repertoire of animal sounds and in pig latin he said "quick find the english pig latin translator..... " "quickly give me more fish" icklyquay ivegay emay oremay ishfay! This made everyone begin to dance and sing in pig latin...and before long everyone starting oinking!
Suddenly we heard a butcher come from out of nowhere and started to process the porker. The sizzling of bacon on a frying pan caused a lady to shout as they needed more bacon. We realized in a flash that we had turned into pigs and ran out of there as quickly as we could, but we could not run fast enough so we wished we could turn into macaws, but unfortunately, that wasn't to be. We were able to waddle our way out of there, but not before the butcher caught one of us to be chased by the dog. But what the butcher did not know was that Crucifix was much smarter than the dog! He started barking at the dog, causing it to become confused and fooled! We looked in amazement as the dog ran toward the butcher, whining and yelping. He nipped at his master's heels causing all of us to wonder in amazement what was going on. The next thing we knew everyone was out of the fire pit just as sharick and neshack the butcher GOT saved and laryy was the leader of the pack and the lady was back from the slater and all rejoiced! They started singing praises to God when suddenly there appeared a thunderous voice from the heavens!! It was so loud we all jumped and trembled as we heard a loud voice say, " Listen to me... this is very important, for if you choose not to, you shall perish!"
Everyone was awestruck and fell to their knees as God said, "Repent, for I am Yahweh..now go and stay close to me and talk with me often. They repented of their ways and Breezy started to sing 'The Mind Of Christ".. my highest goal, the Lord's delight, the desire of my soul, etc. and everyone was feeling a little nervous, after hearing the loud, thunderous voice so they prayed for peace in their hearts and it was given. All felt better so they started walking on their way, humbled by their experience. While walking on the road, they met a broken hearted young woman who was sobbing uncontrollably. They stopped to see what was wrong, as she was holding a bottle of pills. Breezy started talking to her and tried to take them and the lady hit her so hard, that her beautiful MACAW went flying away. Now, BREEZY is a forgiving woman. And Sobriety is VERY important to her. Her main concern then was to get her Macaw calmed down before it attacked the woman. She calmed Schreech down and then approached the woman again. She told the woman that she cared about her and what was happening in her life. She told her about how she herself once used alcohol and drugs to try and make her feel better and help her cope with life. The lady listened and found that there were suggestions for the souution when a visitor offered, "Good luck in your quest!"
This threw Breezy for a loop because she was being inundated with forwards in her email inbox and she started to wonder if she was being "singled out" for any reason. But really she was confused by the amount of the e-mail and it caused her to feel overloaded. But she had her friends at CF and the "joker" in the group increased the amount of e-mail in an attempt to let her know they cared about her, but Breezy's eyes became crossed after trying to keep up with it all so she went to sleep. Suddenly she was startled by the bells and whistles of an approaching train!!!! What! How did she get here!! She jumped out of the way of the train just in time to discover that it was a big dream and that joaddi3's Rx given to Breezy caused Breezy to go "California Dreamin' " so she stopped into a church which was on the way! God was waiting for her like always and he made spaghetti with meatballs and filled her up spiritually as well. She left singing the "Te Deum", not knowing how the words came out of her. But when she realized the words she spoke, she thought to herself, how awesome is He. He never ceases to amaze me! She left the church to go home and she ran into a bus. People gasped as they saw the bus hit her, but there was an ambulance and a doctor nearby, but when they arrived there was not a scratch or bruise on Breezy. They were amazed! People started spinning around, wondering if they were seeing a mirage or it was just their imagination! It wasn't long before they realized that Gary and Larry were among the congregation and saw what was going on and managed to get the crowd calmed down and used the miraculous occassion to witness to people there. But, there was work to be done, so they took some time organizing things so that it could all be handled as smoothly as possible, but they hit a glitch when something caught their eye off to the left...suddenly a huge flying purple people eater came into view and everyone was scared of it, but a group of them started to approach it cautiously not sure what might happen and suddenly fire flew out of its mouth and burnt Ron's beard right off his face. Breezy was shocked and Crucifix threw water and ice on Ron, who was still in need of first aid. He and IntoTheCrimsonSky took care of Ron and Breezy was so grateful. She made a wonderful meal for them and then took them to see a movie, but the usher kicked them out because redneck was trying to get bfluid to follow the popcorn trail to the cash register and tickle the Elmo.
